Water

The water fills up slowly
Hot water, not quite boiling, but hot
I undress
Not slowly, not a strip tease
But also not quickly, not minute man soldier
More calmly, dignified
Pausing slightly between each piece
Not to examine the clothing, but myself
Soon, I look in the mirror
To take in the sight of my body
I breathe deeply and stare into my own eyes
Looking, searching, reassuring
I step into the water
I feel it move around my ankles
The heat nearly takes my breath away
I slip lower and lower into it
Until it covers my mouth
I start swallowing, deeply drinking
To the point where I feel I will vomit
Then I stop swallowing and start thinking
Thinking about what I want to do
The point of my life, of life in general
The water keeps pouring from the faucet
It is now on the tip of my nose
Instead of swallowing, I start breathing
Deeply, feeling the water deep inside me
In parts of me it should not be
I feel sleepy, like I should slip into a dream
Peacefully I float, on a cloud, relaxed
I hear yelling, but it is distant, I do not understand
Almost as if the yelling is the dream
I am vaguely aware of my body leaving the water
Of hands touching my body
But I am no longer of my body, I no longer reside there
I am separate, free, at peace

Simple

I want something simple
Someone to hold my hand
Like when I was little
When we would cross the street
They wanted me safe
They wanted me close
They wanted me
Or when my brother was little
I would hold his hand
Because he wanted to be safe
He wanted to be close
He wanted me
When someone holds your hand
It's because they want you safe
They want you close
They want and love you
That is what I want
Someone to want me safe
Someone to want me close
Someone to want me

Something Strange

Something strange
About when you hold my hand
You probably don't think twice about it
But it's interesting
How comfortable you seem around me
How hard you try to impress me
How much you want me to like things
Like everything you do
You want my approval
It's strange
Yet somehow seems...nice

One Wish

If I had one wish
That wish would be
For you to stay forever with me
Within our house
Within our home
And you would never need to roam
Because you'd have me
And I'd have you
And it would be nice
With just us two
And by my side you'd forever stay
Never wanting once to stray
And neither of us would ever be lonely
If I were scared, you would hold me
And I would do the same for you
And it'd be nice just us two
Yes, if I had one wish to see
It'd be forever you and me

Space

Sometimes at night
When I'm alone
And the moon shines through the window
When I'm aglow from white light
All is quiet and calm
I think about space
What it would be like
To just float endlessly on
To not be living
But neither be dead
Just to exist
Just to be here
Or there
Or everywhere
Or nowhere
To be part of space
Something larger than myself
I think of my native ancestors
What did they think
When gazing at the moon
Did they imagine life
Crops and growth
Hunting and fishing
Death and cycles
Or did they too
Even then
Think of floating endlessly
Just existing

A Really Long Question

Have you ever found someone
Not really found, they were always there
How about located
No, they weren't lost, at least you didn't know they were
Discovered, uncovered
Yes, I like that
Have you ever discovered someone
In perhaps an unlikely place or way
That you knew the person before
But not really knew them
And by talking and getting to know that person
You found yourself
And you would risk everything
To keep this person close
And maybe you didn't have a friend before
At least not really
And perhaps you were slowly falling
And you wanted to give up on things before you met this person
And they happened to come at just the right time
You didn't let anyone close, you were dying inside
But you trusted this person
And this person has pretty much saved you from yourself
Because they were so much like yourself
That they were able to help you?

Days

I think of what's to come
And what I've done
And it goes something like this

I had a home and a simple life
Didn't have much
At least not in the way of love
I was small back then, or at least that's what they say
I sure didn't feel young

That was what used to be
Before I had you and you had me
Back before I knew the right way
Back in those days

There was a story once told to me
That I keep with highest secrecy
And I don't know for certain
But I have a feeling that you might have been a little like me
A little lost without a clue

That was what used to be
Before I had you and you had me
Back before you knew the right way
Back in those days

But the future looks bright
As we talk night to night
And make plans and promise to not be like we were
And keep each other sure

That what we used to be
Isn't the future you and me
Now together we know the right way
Now in the together days